Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Random Thoughts:

-9 times out of 10, when I add a girl from my past on facebook (be it a friend, classmate, old co-worker, or simply an acquaintance) the story is the same. She's usually a single mom or married (it seems the most popular girls in high school are now the single mothers... funny how that works), much fatter then in the past (I LOVE it when that happens), or simply stuck with a guy who seems nowhere NEAR good enough for them.

A good year or so ago, I had a conversation like this with a close friend. Do women of a certain age just... give up? Think nothing better is coming along, and settle for whatever will have them? And if that IS true, is there something wrong with settling? I thought so, she thought not.

-It seems that only the people who KNOW death could come at any moment get tattoos that show. People who are, or have been, seriously ill. I find myself wondering if I really should be throwing caution to the wind and continuously planning on tattoos that I can easily cover. I'd really love an sleeve, or even a chest tattoo. I feel that a large tattoo suits my personality in a lot of ways. I'd hate to have regrets on either side of the spectrum, however. I'll think on that some more.

-I'm thinking of ways I can enjoy life more, so it won't seem so entirely wasted if it is cut short. It's hard to do with a limited budget, really. I feel that 'live each day like it's your last' is really something only possible for the independently wealthy. Which is rather unfortunate.

-I feel very stuck where I am lately. It's not the time or place to do anything about it, but nothing about my job or living situation seems to fit with my personality. It's hard to explain and will possibly be even harder to fix. It's harder still to realize I'm not exactly sure if there is a place that really does "fit" me, because I'm not certain I've found it yet. There are too many options, and I often find myself scared to step off of the steady ground beneath my feet.

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