Tuesday, May 24, 2011

You and I. We're just bittersweet.

So, a little while ago I had this someone.

I didn't have him long enough for him to really be called anything, not really, just a someone.  But still, he was influential to me in a big way.  Made me realize and value a lot about myself.  Made me see how I deserved to be treated.  This was all mostly good, except how he went away, which of course hurt.  Was slightly expected, but hurt all the same...hurt us both, because we all get our hopes up, don't we?  Even in the face of adversity.

But I look back on him fondly, if with a bit of sadness for what might have been.

I heard from him today for the first time in a while, and he said what was maybe the most honest breakdown of the situation I've heard from him yet, and the thing I really need to take away from this all:

"I didn't expect to meet you.  I wanted to be, but I wasn't ready."

It might not sound like much, but that statement turned out to be pretty important to me.  Part of me suspected he wasn't ready, but needed that confirmation.  And the fact that he "wanted to be" ready is complimentary enough for me to be able to take something positive away from the whole mess.

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